Thursday, December 16, 2010

How Hard Is It?

My evil twin has been showing up more and more lately.
She's awful.
She's a yeller and a nagger and stressed and mean.
And my husband is one of the few people that can see her.

She appeared this morning.

It all started with a bottle on the drying rack.

It wasn't clean.

How hard is it to clean out a bottle!?
Soap, hot water, a bottle brush and a little elbow grease.
It's not hard at all.
Know how I know?
I know because I rewashed all of them this morning instead of doing my hair and makeup for work. Beauty.

Every {work}night, after pumping 3+ times over the course of the day, I hand my pump bag to Chris and it's his job to prep Hannah's bottles and clean the pump parts. He does this so that I can spend a few minutes with her before eating dinner.

We agreed that this was one chore he could take off my plate.
But what's the point if he doesn't do it up to my standards?
Now I know that sentance sounds a little harsh, but we're talking about BOTTLES here. There are food born illnesses and nasties and my little baby's tummy at stake here. He can vaccuum or fold laundry craptastically all he wants. My standards for those things have decreased significantly since Hannah arrived.
But when the bottles were still greasy this morning I lost it.
I didn't set aside time this morning to clean them because Chris 'cleaned' them last night.
So I washed them myself. And then I yelled.

Part of me feels bad.
He tried.
I realize that.

I think it goes back to all this pressure I'm feeling about my milk supply.
Since going back to work, it hasn't been great.
I spend all day either pumping, or charting what I pump, or on the phone with mom/Chris finding out how she's doing {how much she's eating} or figuring out when I need to pump next or trying to figure out if I manage to add a FOURTH pumping session to my work day somehow, would THAT give me enough milk to feed her tomorrow.
It's stressful. But it's stress I'm willing to deal with because I'm committed to breastfeeding her.

But since I spend 6am to 6pm stressing about pumping breastmilk, all I want to do when I get home to pop a boob in her mouth and stare at her, not at my pump and dirty bottles.

So, see, I NEED Chris to wash that bottle correctly.
Because when he doesn't Crazy Carla comes out and concludes that he doesn't appreciate all the effort I put into to providing milk for her.
And that's not true.
He does.

I just have an evil twin that likes to come out when I'm sleep deprived and stressed out.

... and I hate pumping.

... and working.


When I'm sitting at work and stop to think of all that I need to do, I find myself SO overwhelmed.

I haven't wrapped a single Christmas present yet. They're all piled up in Hannah's room under her little Christmas tree and I refuse to bring them out to the living room until they've been wrapped in their blue and white paper that I bought to match my fabulous Christmas tree.

I made us all new matching stockings since it's Hannah's first Christmas, but while I finished two, I still need to sew the third and find a place to hang all three.

I need to finish Christopher's Christmas present. He's been wearing a beaded necklace as long as I can remember. He never takes it off and since his last one broke he's kindof looked naked. I bought the beads, unbreakable string and the findings, but I just need to sit down and MAKE it.

I've filmed TONS of vlogs for YouTube, but I just have to find time to sit down and acutally edit and upload them.

I freakin' love cloth diapering but I really need to contribute more videos to the Cloth Diaper collaboration channel. I've been such a craptacular collab member and feel awful about it.

I should keep a cleaner house.

I should really work on the Christmas letter and send those out since I'll be putting Hannah's birth announcement in the same envelope and she's already almost 3 months old.

I HAVE to take her 3 month pictures this weekend. Everyone was sick and in a grumpy mood when she turned 2 months and I didn't get great shots. I CANNOT miss another month.

I'm just stressed and would love to hit the pause button and get caught up, but it probably won't happen. If the world stopped for an hour, a week, a month, I'd just spend it with her instead of checking things off my to-do list.

I'm so in awe of her that just THINKING about her right now has me tearing up.

If the presents don't get wrapped, if the stockings don't get hung, if gifts are given after the 25th and my cards don't arrive until after the new year, if I'm 6 weeks behind on YouTube vlogs and her 3 month pictures are really her 3.25 month pictures, please know that it's because I was busy snuggling with my little girl.

I just don't want to take a single minute with her for granted.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

{Worst} Employee of the Month

I really need to be a better employee.

I have such a bad attitude towards work right now.

I admit that I hate that I'm a working mother.

Just thinking that makes me feel guilty on so many levels.

I feel guilty that I'm not at home with Hannah.

I feel guilty that I'm not more focused while I'm at work
but all I want to do is get home to Hannah.

I feel guilty that I'm not more appreciative of the fact
that I HAVE a job that we NEED me to have.

Then I feel guilty that I wish I could put all the
income earning weight on my husband's shoulders.

It would be great if I was gracefully accepting the situation but,
at 4 weeks into my role as a working mother, I'm just not there yet.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Party Animals

Tonight we hosted our first party as parents.

I really like to entertain and love reading hostess blogs for new tablescape ideas, but the thought of accomplishing all of this with a 2.5 month old was extremely daunting. Also, since we're the "new parents" in the group, Chris is concerned with not being hip anymore (not that he was all that hip before, but on occasion, he could be very cool. Do people say 'cool' anymore? Probably only unhip new parents like me.) ANYWAY I digress.

It was a holiday party for Christopher's coworkers and based on the previous culinary confections I had sent him to work with, the expectations were high. I made cake balls, homemade English toffee, triple chocolate chip cookies, whipped up a heaping punch bowl of Martha's egg nog (with 5 and a half CUPS of hard alcohol and a dozen eggs in it. YEOUCH!) and had a dazzeling Bellini bar set up.

I spent all day getting ready for the party, and yet my favorite part was listening to the overlapping conversations in the kitchen while having a silent one with Hannah in the nursery.

His coworkers are perfectly lovely and some are so funny that I cry from laughter, but nothing beats nursing my little party animal in her leopard print dress. She's so cute that I can't wait to have a whole house full of beautiful babies like her. Spaced out over years, not all in one pregnancy, please.

As we waved goodbye to the final guest, and with Hannah asleep in her crib, we deemed the night a huge success.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

I Admit It.

I love my daughter.
I could lay in bed all day snuggling with her and watching her smile in her sleep.
(in fact I spent the last few days doing just that...)
But it creeps me out to high Heaven when she's asleep and she flutters her eyes open.

Tell me I'm not alone in this.

Her little dream wimpers make up for it though.

Tweaked Sense of Modesty

Hannah was 17 days old on Wednesday. We celebrated by going to our second lactation consultant appointment since we were discharged.

When I think of my life before Hannah and my life now, I can easily pick out 10 changes without even talking about the breast pump that is always in the same room as me. One of these changes is my sense of modesty.

It seems that the moment I checked into the hospital to begin the induction I also turned in any modesty I once had. I thought I would be one of those women whose greatest fear was pooping on the delivery table. I remember being a little off put when my midwife tweaked both nipples and exclaimed with joy when droplets of colostrum leaked out. But that was nothing compared with what would follow. I was practically naked in front of 6 midwifes and at least 8 nurses before Hannah was even born. In between convulsions on the operating table I overheard multiple people discussing whether or not they would need to shave my pubic hair - WHAT?! - not to mention the room full of people, my husband included, that then literally saw my insides. Shortly after delivery, nurses whose names I didn't know massaged my uterus and then watched to see how much blood I expelled. In the recovery room nurses emptied my urine bag, examined my incision and mopped up blood when I tried standing for the first time.

I went from being a fairly private person - public youtube life aside - to someone that barely had a bodily function that wasn't monitored around the clock.

Upon coming home I found myself on the couch, topless, trying in vain to get a screaming baby to breastfeed. The moment I put on a fresh shirt it was immediately transparent with streams of milk. With time and a great visit to the lactation consultant department at the hospital, I could now latch Hannah on with very little discomfort. I barely blinked an eye at the idea of whipping on a boob with my mom in the room and didn't even hesitate when the other person was my husband. But these were both loved one that I'd known for years.

Which brings me to our appointment on Wednesday.

I don't even remember the consultant's name, but within minutes of meeting her I was topless, had my nipples inspected and fed my daughter with this stranger sitting next to me.

"She's a professional." says Chris.

And I want to ask him how comfortable he'd be bearing it all in front of a doctor he'd just met. But I know the answer and I know him well enough to know that he'd dismiss the parallel and continue the debate. He loves to argue...

I listened as women warned me about all the changes that motherhood would bring. That I wouldn't be able to see a news story about a missing child without hugging mine a little closer. (True.) That I would forget to put on makeup when getting ready for a family outing because getting the baby ready would take all my energy. (Very True.) That I'd start viewing my stretch marks as mommy badges of pride (Not so true...). But no one prepared me for the complete lose of modesty I'd experience so abruptly.

I don't know what how I'd have prepared myself if someone had warned me, but I assume I would have started with getting a bikini wax.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

2 Weeks

I'm amazed at the sheer amount of life changes that have happened in the last two weeks since Hannah's birth.

I really want to detail everything, but it's almost midnight on Christopher's last day of Daddy Leave and I'd rather go snuggle in bed since he's done watching jeopardy episodes out of the DVR. It will all just have to wait till tomorrow when Hannah is napping. She's a fabulous daytime napper - not so great at sleeping during the evening hours. I think we exhausted her today though. We went apple picking and had lots of FIRSTs. I'll tell you all about it tomorrow.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

39 Weeks!

•Total weight gain/loss•
About 9 pounds above pre-pregnancy.

•Maternity clothes?•
My maternity shirts aren't really covering the underside of the tummy anymore. It's not cute. :)

The bladder pressure has begun and I'm up to two middle of the night pee breaks. It sucks.

•Best moment this week•
At my 38.5 week midwife appointment I found out I was 50% effaced and a fingertip dialated. I wasn't surprised that I'm not that dialated - I haven't had any contractions - but I was stoked to learn that at least I'm starting to thin out and efface.

She's letting me know she's in there, but for the most part her movements are stretches. GOOD. I hope she runs out of room in there are comes out 'early'.

•Food cravings•
ICE. The best part about doing the non stress test at the hospital is the cup of crushed ice they give me. I drink cups and cups of ice water just so the ice will get melted a little bit and I'll be able to crunch it up and eat it. Weird. I also really love nectarines.

Team pink.

•Labor Signs•
I've got a wicked back ache that won't quit. Part of my hopes it's the start of back labor - the other part of me is scared crap-less that it's not connected to the baby at all and it's just a stupid back ache and I'm in pain for nothing. I guess I'll find out at my next midwife appointment.

•Belly Button in or out?•
Still an innie, but barely.

•What I miss•
Being able to roll over in bed without grunting, groaning and grabbing onto stationary objects to HEAVE my tummy over.

•What I am looking forward to•
Contractions. Seriously, lets get this show on the road!

•Weekly Wisdom•
Internals aren't that painful. Full moons don't induce labor and even though I was born on my parent's 2nd anniversary doesn't mean that she'll be born on ours. :)

1 week till my due date.

Friday, August 20, 2010

When it rains, It pours

Chris and I had a good laugh last night.

We just can't believe that this whole pregnancy has gone by SO smoothly - barely a bump in the road - only to have this many issues crop up in the final weeks.

I had my growth ultrasound yesterday morning.
Chris called at 6 to let me know that he wouldn't be able to make it to the appointment. His other full timer called out and they were short staffed as is. It's the first appointment that he's missed and, looking back, one of the handful he REALLY should have been at. Bummer.

So I go in for the scan, it's just your basic ultrasound, and right away she's able to tell me that she's head down and facing my spine like a good girl - no more fears of delivering sunny side up - but because of that we probably won't be able to get any pictures. No biggie. At this point I know I'll be able to see her in a few weeks and really, I'm not that concerned about grainy ultrasound pictures anymore.

She starts looking things over. Checking kidneys (I ask if she has three like my great grandmother and unless it's hiding, she probably doesn't *wink*), looking at the bladder and spine, Checking the blood flow to the heart... etc etc.

All of the sudden I get tunnel vision, extremely nauseated, wicked lightheaded and feel like I'm going to pass out. I've never felt like that before. So I stop the scan and take a breather. She was sitting with all her weight on my artery and there was an issue with blood flow. The rest of the ultrasound is done with me laying on my side.
If we were in AP English, the teacher would point out that this was a foreshadow moment.

So the tech started taking measurements. For those that haven't had an ultrasound recently, when they measure... let's say the diameter of the head for example, the find a specific cross section by looking for anatomical landmarks, then they draw a circle around the skull's edge and as they size the circle to get it to fit perfectly, there is a number on the screen that gives you the measurement in centimeters as well as the corresponding gestational age. So she measures the diameter of the head (37 weeks) and the circumference of the head (39weeks 3 days), then she measures the femur (39weeks 3 days) Keep in mind that I turned 38 weeks yesterday so she's still tall! :)

She measures the amniotic fluid levels and tells me the placenta is about 4 cm thick. Good to know.

Then she measures the tummy.

She finds the correct cross section and starts drawing the circle. As she's sizing the circle, I'm watching the gestational age go up. 37 weeks, 38 weeks, 39 weeks, 40 weeks, 41 weeks, 42 weeks, and then. To my horror. It stops listing weeks and switches to just a centimeter reading. Oh My God.

So clearly, I'm thinking this chick SERIOUSLY screwed up with that measurement. Good thing they take 3 readings and average them.

The next one was 41 weeks 1 day.

The next was 42 weeks 0 days.

This is not comforting.

All of the sudden the ultrasound is over and she tells me the doctor will be in to go over the results in a few minutes.

I grab my clipboard and write down the recordings so I can tell Chris. The average tummy measurement was 41w 5d. Almost 4 weeks ahead of where she should be. I do a rough calculation, dividing the circumferce of her tummy by pi and realize that the diameter is greater than 10 cm.

All of a sudden I realize that she is really going to hurt me and rethink the epidural.

About 10 minutes later the doctor comes in. She's a woman and I recognize her name as a perinatologist my midwives referred me to. She said that the baby looks healthy and will probably be tall, which isn't surprising. She said the amniotic fluid level is normal, but at the high end of normal. Better than the low end I think and imagine a giant tidal wave when my water breaks.

Then she says that the concern is the weight.

Her tummy is measuring very large and they think she currently weighs 8lbs 11oz.

Wait a minute.
Wait just a minute there Missy.

In my head I freak out a little.
I'm thinking about how I weighed myself right before I came in for the appointment and I was only 8 pounds 14 oz above pre-pregnancy.

How can she weigh 8lbs 11oz if I've only gained 8lbs 14oz and I don't have gestational diabetes.

It's not like I've gained 50 pounds with this pregnancy.

My midwives joked on Monday that I should expect an 8.5 to 9 pound baby. When my eyes bugged a little she said "What do you expect a 5lb baby? You're 6', your husband is 6'2". Big people make big babies. Small people make small babies, that's just the way it works." Which is fine. Because that's based on the assumption that that's how much she'll weigh WHEN SHE'S BORN. Not 2 weeks before her due date with no labor signs anywhere on the horizon.

The doctor asks me to wait in the waiting room and another perinatologist will consult with me in a few minutes.

I go out into the empty room to tell Chris the 'good' news and imagine the doctors convening a huddle to talk about the giant baby with the ginormous tummy.

While I'm talking to Chris and my mom in the waiting room I try to rationalize the news in my head.

It'll be fine. They'll probably just induce me early. If she's this big already, and I have a clotting disorder, certainly they won't let me go past my due date and risk a c-section.

I'm called back by the nicest nurse ever named Malorie. Melody. Marjorie. Something. Nurse M.

She has me do the usual weigh in and pee in a cup routine. At this point, I'm a natural at this party trick. I don't even flinch at the thought of a public weigh-in anymore.

Then we go back into the room and she tells me she's going to take my blood pressure.
I remind her that I've just been told my 38 week fetus weighs almost 9 pounds and ask for a few minutes to calm down. She takes my medical history and a few minutes later, when she takes my BP it's 120/70. WAY lower than I thought it would be.

So the resident come in and starts talking to me about the Factor V leiden issue.
They must see this all the time because she's telling me that since I'm hetero vs homozygous (meaning I only inherited from one side of the family and not both) that they consider me a fairly low risk patient.

Instead of the 6 months of blood thinners, they'll probably only do 4-6 weeks. Which is fabulous because then she goes on to tell me that it's not a pill, it's a SubQ shot that I give myself once or twice a day depending on the dosage. ugh. shots.

I ask about side effects and whether it'll be a issue for breastfeeding. She says that bruising at the injection site (duh, it's a blood thinner) and platelet counts can be effected so I'll need to do weekly blood work for the first two weeks. Meh, no biggie. Apparently I'll start this regimen 12-24 hours after delivery.

Then we talk about the humongous baby I'm growing.

She asks about my weigh gain and seems surprised when I tell her the low number. She grabs my chart and I know she's looking at my glucose test results Which Are AMAZING. She's surprised to say the least. I can tell she's a resident. She hasn't developed her poker face yet.

I ask about inducing early. 'Oh no, we'll probably only discuss induction at 41 to 42 weeks.'

But I thought I wasn't going to go past 41 weeks because of concerns for the placenta?

'Well, obviously the placenta is functioning well because your baby is getting plenty of nutrients and you're getting weekly non stress tests, so we're not concerned'

Glad to hear you're not concerned.
Isn't she gaining a half a pound a week at this point?

'Yes, but the ultrasound could be off by 10% which is a pound."

So she weighs somewhere between 7lb 11oz and 9lb 11oz. And if she goes to 42 weeks she could weigh between 9lb 11oz and 11lb 11oz.

'That's possible'

And you're not concerned about that?

'We'll repeat the growth scan at 41 weeks if you're still pregnant. If she weighs 5000 grams, we'll offer an elective c-section.'

How many pounds is 5000 grams?

'... ugh, about 10 pounds' Oh nay nay, stupid resident. I googled. 5000grams is ELEVEN pounds.

*blank face* So. a c-section. With a clotting disorder.

This is where I start crying.

The doctor comes in and basically says the same crap.

They won't induce early unless my blood pressure goes up to 140/90 because if my cervix isn't favorable it will just lead to a c-section.

They told me they won't use forceps or a vacuum extractor. If her head won't fit, her shoulders won't fit and they'll do a c-section.

They also mentioned that the should issue, distocia, could be 'catastrophic'.

Bad choice of words. I had just stopped crying and then I started again.

If my labor isn't progressing, they don't want to risk a blood clot, so they'll do a c-section.

Basically, the perinatologists really like c-sections.

By the end of the appointment, besides crying, all I wanted to do was go to the midwives because I know their goal is NO c-section. I also wanted to go on a long walk, eat a lot of pineapple and spicy food, do jumping jacks, bounce on an exercise ball, schedule daily acupuncture sessions and just about anything else to GET HER OUT.

I'm not done being pregnant, but I'm done baking this little girl.

As far as I'm concerned, I'm issuing an eviction notice and operation 'Get the Eff Out' has begun.

Here's hoping for an August baby.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Non Stress Test #1

Because of the factor V diagnosis, I need to go in for weekly Non Stress Tests until I deliver. Since my midwife appointments are first thing Monday morning, I've been able to schedule the NST immediately afterward.

The NST monitors her heartbeat, movements and my contractions over 20 minutes. Since they need a 20 minute continuous strip and she is a diva, it took about an hour. Not bad for our first time.

I started out in a room with a reclining chair and had the sensors (1 for her HB, 1 for contractions) placed on my tummy and held in place by bands. It's the same setup you see in labor and delivery. She was good for about 10 minutes and then moved and we lost the HB. The nurse came back in and repositioned the sensor only for the baby to move the second the nurse walked out of the room. She came back in and spent a few minutes trying to find the HB, but our little girl has gotten REALLY good at hide n go seek.

So they moved me to a room with a bed and brought in a portable ultrasound. By laying flat, there were less places for her to hide. Turns out she's facing out instead of facing my spine so they were trying to listen to her HB through her chest instead of her back, which is apparently much harder. They had me roll over on my side (NOT comfy given my pelvis issues) in order to get a better angle, but she rolled over as well and foiled their attempts. So Chris had to come around and hold the sensor in place for 20 minutes. So much for him using this downtime to read the birthing book he needs to finish!

I had no contractions while we were there. Not even a blip. Which I expected.
I also felt vindicated because the readout showed that she was kicking NONstop during the NST (as she does all day long). This girl doesn't give me a break! (But I'm okay with that) Everytime she moved it put a little black dot on the screen. Chris was pretty impressed when instead of the random dot her and there, she was producing a solid line of neverending movement. :)

So the NST went fine. Her heartbeat was right where it should be and the nurse said that with a baby that active, we had no reason to worry. ... Not that we were.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

37.5 Midwife Appt

Monday we had our week 37 midwife appointment and it went pretty well. My weight was down a pound from last week, the urine strip was negative for protein and sugar and my blood pressure was fine.

My fundal height was measuring at 40cm (or 40 weeks). I don't know what my fundal height was last week (I got a little preoccupied when they thought she was breech again - she's not), but I know I was 34cm and 34.5 weeks, so the discrepency happened over the last three weeks. Meh. No biggie.

We signed our release form for the Waterbirth tub, so now we just need to pay the fee. We also turned in the paperwork to donate her cord blood to the public blood bank.

The midwife showed me how to feel her head when I'm laying down, and her heartbeat was about 135.

We confirmed that I'm Group B Strep negative so I won't have to get antibiotics during labor and will be allowed to stay home longer before coming in to the hospital. I'll still need to have an IV, but that's for the clotting issue.

That's about it! The appointment went really well.

Friday, August 13, 2010

I'm Defective

After Monday's midwife appointment, I'm glad I live nowhere near Arkansas, or I'd be knocking on my Aunt's door and promptly screaming at her.

Apparently 3 years ago when my cousin (Dad's half-sister's daughter) went into labor with her daughter, there was a very serious complication and she almost died.

Fast forward three years and my aunt finally mentions to my dad that I should be tested to see if I have the same condition Shelly has since it's genetic.

So at my midwife appointment two weeks ago, I asked to have the blood test done and on Monday I got the results -

I'm positive for Factor V Leiden.

It's a rare blood clotting disorder that occurs in about 5% of the Caucasian population, but up to 15% of some Swedish communities. The midwives almost never deal with it and had we known about it before I had gotten pregnant, I would have been with a high risk doctor and VERY closely monitored throughout this whole pregnancy.

The concern is that I'm at much higher risk for blood clots - Deep venous thrombosis in my leg, Pulmonary Embolism in my lung, or an Ischemic Stroke caused by a blood clot in the brain.

If that wasn't fun enough, I'm also at risk for a blood clot in the placenta or cord which would probably be fatal for the baby.

I should have been on blood thinners for the duration of the pregnancy, I should have been getting weekly Non Stress Tests, I should have been meeting with a perinatologist and hematologist on a consistent basis. But none of that happened because my aunt failed to share this information with the rest of the family when they found out THREE YEARS AGO.

Can you tell I'm a little upset?
I'm not.

To say I was a little upset would be the understatement of the century.
I'm pissed.

This condition put me at extremely high risk for a miscarriage.
Stillbirth is still a huge concern.
and had I had a c-section without knowing about this condition, it could have had serious complications.

They probably won't let me go past 41 weeks, due to concern for the placenta.
I can't go on most birth control options because it raises my risk of blood clots 35 times.
and I'll be on blood thinners for 6 months after her birth.

Don't get me wrong. I'm thankful that I know NOW before anything bad happened, but I just find it hard to believe that they didn't think I should know about this family condition the second after they found out. Since I tested positive, that means my father also has it.

I'm upset that he had a heart attack and they still didn't mention it.
I'm upset that they put me at risk when I was on birth control before I got pregnant.
I'm upset that they let me go 8 months into my pregnancy without telling me.

But I find it unforgivable that they knowingly put my baby at risk.

I had a minimal relationship with them before,
but now I want nothing to do with them.

37 Weeks!

•Total weight gain/loss•
About 8 pounds above pre-pregnancy. As of Monday at my midwife appointment, I weighed 1/2 pound less than I did 2 weeks ago. I wish I could lose weight and still eat the way I do when I'm NOT pregnant. That would be awesome.

•Maternity clothes?•
I need to do laundry. Seriously. Last weekend was busy - I got my haircut and ran errands on Saturday, we went to the Bite of Oregon and the Trader Joe's Comopany party on Sunday, we had a LONG midwife appointment on Monday. I probably could have thrown in a few loads in between everything, but I didn't.

I'm still sleeping like a rock and hitting the snooze button WAY too many times each morning. I still only have 1 bathroom break in the middle of the night at about 3am which is amazing considering how much water I chug right before bed.

•Best moment this week•
This week wasn't this great, but the best 'moment' was probably on Wednesday. Chris felt awful so he called out sick for the first time in 6 years, and I wasn't feeling too hot either, so I called out sick as well. We slept in and laid around until almost noon. It was glorious.
and probably something we'll never be able to do again :)

When she was measuring my fundal height, my midwife got a little concerned that she might have flipped back to breech. She couldn't feel the head down low and there was a nice round mass high on my stomach. So she called for the ultrasound machine to verify the position. Turns out her head is so low that she was feeling the shoulders and that round mass was her booty. She's still head down and probably engaged. It makes sense I guess - she hasn't been as crammed up in my ribs lately and most of the kicks are lower than they were last week. I kept hearing horror stories about the 'lightening' pain I'd feel when she engaged. I guess compared to my pelvis pain, engaging is nothing.
ahhh, the bright side. :)

•Food cravings•
I haven't really been crazy about food this week. I eat when I'm hungry, that's about it.

I did have Chris buy some ambrosia salad while he was at the grocery store last night and promptly ate it for dinner when I got home.... But that's about the only ridiculous food stunt I pulled this week. Much better than my tirimisu frenzy of week 36.


•Labor Signs•
The midwives suggested that I start acupuncture again, now that I'm full term, to start thinning the cervix. I had my first induction appointment last night and, besides the needle she shoved just below my pinkie nail, it was awesome. By the time I paid my copay and walked out the front door, I had some serious menstrual type cramps. They faded sometime in the middle of the night, but at least it started doing something! (I told her to take it easy and not do TOO good of a job stimulating the points as Chris is going camping on the coast this weekend with Shakes and Sarah and I'll be home alone. Smart huh? *wink*)

•Belly Button in or out?•
Still an innie, but barely.

•What I miss•
Pepto Bismol.
Anyone that knows me knows that, besides loving anything pink, I keep pepto with me wherever I go - car, desk, bathrooms, luggage, etc. Inevitably the one time I don't have it will be the time I get a stomach ache.

BUT, pepto is not safe for use during pregnancy. So now on the rare occassion that I have a little heartburn or indigestion, I have to take tums instead. I seriously miss pepto.
Chris thinks I'm crazy for loving the pink chalk as much as I do.

•What I am looking forward to•
The weekend. I've got a few more projects to finish up in the nursery - finishing touches here and there - and then I'll be ready. I also need to do all the laundry from last week and this week, as well as sleep at least 8 hours per night, get some reading in and finish simplifying my Birth Plan for the hospital. I'm tempted to just write: "I'm with the midwives for a reason. Keep it calm and don't offer drugs. If I want to get in the pool, let me." But I feel like I should offer a few more details than that.

•Weekly Wisdom•
We took our Infant Safety and CPR class on Wednesday(No More Classes!!) and it was really quite informative. She went over the role of the local poison control (based out of OHSU and providing coverage for Oregon, Alaska and Guam. Random.), information about SIDS and the Back to Sleep and Feet to Foot Program - basically put the baby to sleep on its back and have the feet touching the foot of the bed so that they don't burrow under the blankets when they start the natural 'grounding' tendancy to find their boundary. She talked about Kangaroo Care and Carseat installation. We had just installed them earlier that day and really should have waited. We ended up putting them in correctly, but only after a lot of trial and error with the seat placement and leveling. We were sweating and feisty by the end of it, but at least we now know what works best for our cars. We still need to have them inspected however.

Then we did the CPR and Choking training.
I hope to never have to use that information though.

Full Term! 'nough said.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

36 Weeks!

•Total weight gain/loss•
8 pounds above pre pregnancy or down 2 from last week. Last week was hot and I was having issues with ... cankles. Yes I can admit it now. I had cankles. Some nights were so bad that I had creases in the front of my cankles. It was not pretty.
But the heat has backed off and I took it easy this weekend and now my feet are back to normal! Yay! I have indentations on my feet! I never thought I'd be so happy. So, anyway, I lost a couple pounds of water weight. Which means I need to eat more popsicles. At least that's what I'm taking away from this developement.

•Maternity clothes?•
This weekend we have the Trader Joe's company party. Finding a maternity dress that is flattering, befitting the dressy yet casual atmosphere of a TJ's party and doesn't cost a million bucks because it's maternity is a hard feat. Then finding one that fits a 6' tall chick is darn near impossible.

I settled on this number from Motherhood:

Basic black, not that fun, but it'll work. :)

*snooze* *snooze* *snooze*
I fall asleep in seconds and refuse to wake up.

•Best moment this week•
The best moment came as a result of the worst moment.
Chris was in a car accident on Thursday. A woman driving a Tahoe ran a stop sign and hit Chris at 4am while he was on his way to work. The car was totalled and the air bag deployed, but he walked away relatively unhurt. So on Saturday we went car shopping and it was fabulous to walk into a dealership and be so financially secure that no one batted an eyelash at selling us a car and giving us the lowest interest rate I have ever seen. Best of all, Christopher's car now has power doors and windows. and is clean. WOOT!

She was a wiggle worm on Tuesday, but was pretty quiet yesterday. I still have her little butt shoved out high on my right side. Chris keeps reminding me that although it feels huge, it's small compared to her head. Gee hun. Thanks.

•Food cravings•
popsicles. And sausage burritos from McDonalds. :)

I also had an insatiable hankerin' for Italian desserts yesterday. Canolli, Tirimisu, Gelato... It was a hard choice. Chris made this fabulous pasta dish: kale and fresh green beans with bacon over whole wheat angel hair pasta... OMG... and then we went to Pastini's (this local Italian chain) and ordered dessert. Yes, we went to a restaurant just for dessert. Chris wasn't complaining.
and it was delish.
I got the tiramisu and Chris got this amazing looking chocolate cake with ice cream.


•Labor Signs•
None. We'll know more on Monday, but I'm not expecting much progression yet.

•Belly Button in or out?•
Still an innie.

•What I miss•
Eh. This week was pretty good on the pregnancy front - I slept fine, my pelvis feels better now that I'm have chiro done 2x a week on it, I'm not swollen like a blimp.... I'm good. :)

It would be nice to wear my weddign ring though. It still fits in the morning, but I'm afraid it would become too tight while at work. And before you suggest it, my ring doesn't really look good when strung on a necklace.

•What I am looking forward to•
I'm looking forward to the midwife appt and seeing if anything is happening. It probably isn't, but I just can't believe we're already at the home stretch of the pregnancy.

•Weekly Wisdom•
We took the waterbirth class last night. We'll have to see if I'm able to take advantage of the opportunity on delivery day, but at least we know what to expect.
The instructor did a fabulous job of giving us a mental image of what to expect when labor starts and when we arrive at the hospital so I feel much more confident now and know that when things DO start that we should just sleep and eat and relax in order to conserve energy. She made a lot of sense. And now that I have a mental image of the intake process and possibly how water immersion would go, I am starting to be able to picture myself actually doing it. Which is nice.

Even if she's not born until I'm 42 weeks, she'll still be here in less than 45 days. That's SO soon! Also, there is now less than a month till her due date and only 1 week till she's considered full term! Amazing.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

35 Weeks!

•Total weight gain/loss•
10 pounds above pre pregnancy. At this point I'm beginning to wonder just how much of my future weigh gain will be strictly water weight and how much will be actually weight gain. Let the swollen feet begin.

•Maternity clothes?•
Can't wear anything else!

While last week I slept very lightly, this week I have been exhausted at bed time and have slept like a rock. I doubt whether or not I even roll over in the middle of the night. Plus I want to start napping, but the boss frowns on that sorta thing.

•Best moment this week•
The baby shower was so cute! My coworkers really went over the top with the decorations and games. It was a really nice afternoon. Then we picked the boys up from Beerfest and dealt with their drunken-ness all evening.

My pelvis still kills, however the chiropractor adjustment on Monday relieved the pain long enough for me to get some shopping done. I'm looking forward to my next appointment on Friday.

•Food cravings•
I don't really care what it is as long as there is plenty of it. Nectarines and grapes are currently fabulous. I still can't get enough Fruit Floes Popsicles - I should have just bought a case instead of relying on Chris to remember to stock the freezer before his weekend (I think he forgot to buy some today, but it's understandable given the morning he had - more on that later.)


•Labor Signs•
None. The midwife said that we can start internals at the next appointment and to consider starting acupuncture back up when I turn 37 weeks as it's been shown to help... well.. everything labor related. I just don't want to go too late. If I go late, that means she has more time to grow, and the bigger she gets, the more likely I'll have to resort to using pain medicine and the lower my chances of a waterbirth become.

•Belly Button in or out?•
Still an innie.

•What I miss•
Sleeping on my tummy.
That sounds like heaven right about now.
So does Ice Cream.
and judging by the monsterous kick I just got, she agrees.

•What I am looking forward to•
The weekend. I've got lots of stuff I want to get done in her room before I post the pictures everyone has been requesting, and I'm too tired after work to get going on them.

•Weekly Wisdom•
It's not just me and Chris anymore. There is a lot more at stake now.
That fact became very clear to me this morning when Chris called to tell me that he'd been in an accident and his car was totalled. I tell ya, I have never cared less about a material possession than I did at that moment. All I cared about was whether or not he was safe. Which thankfully he is.

... But it does suck that both of our cars have been totalled in less than 8 months, and that car payments which were just about to end will undoubtedly get a couple years added on to them. But Chris is fine and no one else was in the car. He wasn't at fault and we have awesome insurance. These are all things to be thankful for. Besides, his car didn't have power doors - which was SO annoying. A little upgrade upgrade will be nice I suppose.

35 weeks = 35 days till her due date and just 2 weeks until she's full term. Woot!
I'm also shocked that it's seriously almost August and she could be an August baby.

It's getting down to the wire!

Thursday, July 22, 2010

34 Weeks!

She's 5 pounds and probably upwards of 19-20 inches long at this point. From here on out, she'll be gaining about a 1/2 pound a week. 99% of babies born at this point do well with few long lasting effects - but she'd probably be in the NICU for a bit, so she can wait a few more weeks! No hurry!

If I say her name and start talking to her, she'll start kicking in response. Now we just need to get her to learn Christopher's voice.

•How far along?•
34 weeks

•Total weight gain/loss•
7-8 pounds above pre pregnancy!

•Maternity clothes?•
I'm seriously going to miss these jeans when this is all over.
I love them.
I never have to worry if my zipper is down.

My sleep is getting lighter - the dogs or Chris rolling over wake me fairly easily. I've also established a consistent 3am pee break. Eh, It was bound to happen sooner or later. :)

•Best moment this week•
Nesting kicked in this past weekend. Cleaned the master bedroom (including steam cleaning carpet) and the den (including organizing all of our filing and paperwork). Now I just need to clean the living room.
Or I can let Chris do that.

Hers or Mine?

She has been rolling and squirming A LOT. For the past 4 days she's had her feet (?) wedged up under my ribs on the right hand side. I don't think she's engaged yet though because when I push on her tush, high on the right side, what I assume to be her head pokes out on the lower left side. And then she punches me. Diva.

She's quite literally breaking my pelvis. Some days it doesn't hurt much. Other days, like yesterday, it gets so bad the pain brings tears to my eyes just walking across the office. I'm wearing the support belt a couple hours each day but it isn't doing much. Resting seems to be the only thing that helps. I have a chiropractic appointment on Monday and I'm hoping and praying she's able to alleviate some of this pain.

•Food cravings•
Yesterday was Mexican food (because a coworker mentioned using cilantro in her homemade salsa). But Trader Joe's Carribbean Fruit Floes are still my favorite. Chris brought home 4 boxes on Monday night and I'm VERY proud of myself that I only ate 2 last night after breastfeeding class and one for breakfast. ... Reminder, they're only 80 calories and are just frozen fruit. A lecture is not called for. In fact, if you want to reprimand ANYONE for their bad eating habits, talk to Chris who ate a hot pocket and a 600 calorie peanut satay box before bed. My 160 calories worth of fruit bars is nothing compared to that.


•Labor Signs•

•Belly Button in or out?•
Still an innie.

•What I miss•
Having all the time in the world to get ready for her! *wink*

•What I am looking forward to•
My baby shower with the ladies from work is on Saturday! Should be fun!

•Weekly Wisdom•
Oregon leads the nation with the highest rate of breastfeeding moms. Impressive.

It's time to install the car seat and pack my hospital bag so that they're ready when I turn 35 weeks. WOW! We purchased the car seat and travel system back in early February (I think...) and it's been in the garage ever since. I can't wait to bust open the boxes! Also, I think we're going to open the pack in play this week and let it air out (probably in the den) and make sure all the pieces are included. That way it's ready to go when she's here and we need to move it up into the room.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

33 Weeks!

She could grow a whole inch this week! It feels like she's all knees and elbows sticking out everywhere, so I'm not surprised that she's getting taller and starting to run out of room.

•How far along?•
33 weeks

•Total weight gain/loss•
I haven't looked lately.

•Maternity clothes?•
We had our childbirth classes all weekend, so while I do have a nice maternity wardrobe, I didn't do any laundry like I usually do on Sunday. Slim pickin's

I've been surviving on about 6.5 hours of sleep a night with 1 or 2 bathroom breaks. Without some hardcore maternity leave training on the fine art of sleep deprivation, I think that's just about my limit while maintaining a 14+ hour day.

•Best moment this week•
I had a really good midwife appointment on Monday. We learned that we could wait until the umbilicle cord stopped pulsating to cut it and still be able to donate the remaining cord blood to the public bank. I had NO protein in my urine which is amazing, and my BP didn't ring any alarm bells. My fundal height was 32.5cm at 32.5 weeks which is spot on and we got it confirmed that she's finally head down. Let just hope she stays that way. (I've been getting some serious right rib kicks today, so that's a good sign.)

She is getting really strong. Her movements and stretches are easy to feel and see nowadays, which makes sense since there is now more baby than amniotic fluid!! She's learning to tap dance on my ribs, which is cute for the most part. The midwife said she was head down, with her spine along my right side, feet at the top and punching my left side. That fits with the movements I feel.

•Food cravings•
Ice cream and popsicles. still. and PEACHES! I've quickly made my way through a dozen count flat we bought at TJ's the other day. They're delish. If I could just alternate a fresh peach and a TJ Carribean Fruit Flo Popsicle all day long, I'd be a happy girl.


•Labor Signs•
None this week. But I'm starting the countdown. She's seriously killing my pelvis. And while some days I'm fine, then there are days like today where I could just cry at the thought of having to get up and walk to the bathroom... for the fifth time this afternoon.

We bought a pregnancy hip support belt thing. It's hardcore medical grade. It's super comfortable to walk around in, but is unbearable to sit in. So therefore, everytime I stand up I have to put it on before leaving my cubicle and then take it off before sitting back down. You also have to take it off when using the restroom. It's only day one and I think my coworkers are going to get REALLY tired of hearing the *RRRIIIIIIPPPPPP* of that much velcro day in and day out.

•Belly Button in or out?•
Not much change since last week.

•What I miss•
Walking without a waddle.

•What I am looking forward to•
The weekend!! I've got quite a few nursery projects to work on, but it'll be so nice to relax on the couch during breaks. Working is really starting to wear on me.

•Weekly Wisdom•
OHSU has a 60% epidural rate and a 33% c-section rate. Considering that they are one of the best high-risk pregnancy hospitals around, those stats are amazing. I'm just impressed by the 40% non-epidural rate. That tells me that the Labor and Delivery nurses are really great at helping to go as natural as possible. Also, they don't have a nursery, so the babies room in full time. Woot!

Less than 50 days till my due date and 5 weeks till full term. She's almost here!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Not Baby Related... for once.

Chris and I went to a concert last night at Mississippi Studios in North Portland. I bought a tickets shortly after the One Tree Hill finale where I absolutely fell in love with Wakey!Wakey!'s music. The lead singer of the band plays a bartender on the show and they feature a lot of his music. If you like indie pop/singer songwriters, you just might like their music.

It's different than my usual 'Boys with Guitars' genre in that the band is mainly piano and violin. So Good.

Here's some of my favorite singles:

Almost Everything

Light Outside

The surprise of the evening was the opening band - Andrew Belle.

His music sounded eerily familiar, but I couldn't place it. It turns out that his music is heavily featured on Grey's Anatomy and it played during one of the best scenes of the finale. (scene starts at 1:05)

For just the song: In My Veins

It was a fabulous concert! Chris enjoyed 4 too many hefeweizens and, I'm proud to say, went to the restroom WAY more than the pregnant chick. Good thing he's got a built in designated driver for a few more weeks at least.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Someone get me a Walker

It's like overnight this pregnancy went from easy peasy to annoyingly painful.


It hurts when I walk, bend, squat, sit, climb stairs, put on pants, get into or out of a car, cross my legs (even if only at the ankle) or roll over while sleeping.

So as long as I'm not doing any of those things... which leaves very little... the pain decreases to a dull roar.

Holy pelvis.
Someone get me a chiropractor on retainer and a heating pad, STAT!

And by someone, I mean Chris.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

daddy's perspective

Yay!  Carla finally let me be an author on this blog!  Now, I can let you know things from the guy's side of pregnancy and parenthood.

Basically, I'm fine and Carla is miserable.

But with the 100 degree weather this week - we'll both be miserable now.

look forward to more insight from the Y chromosome side of things!

32 Weeks!

At about 4 pounds, she's getting bigger and stronger each day! Between now and week 34 her brain will be working on developing the ability to suck, swallow and breathe at the same time. If she can't do all those simultaneously when she's born, then she wouldn't be able to nurse and would have to rely on a feeding tube.

•How far along?•
32 weeks

•Total weight gain/loss•
I'm 5-6 pounds above my prepregnancy weight.

•Maternity clothes?•
It's amazing how much bigger my stomach looks when I wear a maternity dress.

I did a pretty good job of waking up on my own after 8 hours of sleep this weekend. I know I'll never see 8 hours of sleep again once she gets here, but considering the long 10-11 hours of sleep I was pulling on previous weekends, I'm pretty impressed with myself.

•Best moment this week•
Getting out of the house and splashing in the ocean for a bit.

She's been quite the wiggle worm today. All the kicks and stretches are in the top of my tummy still, so I think she's still head down. I never REALLY know where she it until she gets the hiccups though.

•Food cravings•
Ice cream and popsicles. Could be the warm weather that finally decided to show up though.

A girl I met online just found out at 35 weeks that its a boy and not a girl.
So much for HER pink nursery....
I'm holding on tight to team Pink though.

•Labor Signs•
I had a good round of braxton hicks contractions the other night. They were about 3 minutes apart for about 45 minutes. At first I just thought I had an upset stomach, but then I thought "These might just be BH..." So I noted the times that the next two started and found that they were 3 minutes apart, so I told myself 'if they're really 3 minutes apart, then the next one will start at 8:19p.' At 8:19p another one happened. 8:22, 8:26, 8:29, 8:32, 8:35... So then I got up and took the dogs outside and paced back and forth a bit and they immediately stopped. False Alarm! :)

Good thing. I know BH are fine and they're just the body's way of practicing, but it kindof freaked me out when I noticed that they were in such a consistent interval.

I've also had some pain when standing and walking. Its been minor and comes and goes, but Wednesday it was pretty hardcore. I walked a bit at lunch time and that wasn't awesome, but doable. I'll definitely have to mention it to the midwife on Monday. She'll probably tell me that there's nothing she can do about it. blah blah blah. I'm just concerned about being able to work and go on inspections if it gets any worse.

I'm amazed that my back has felt so good throughout this pregnancy though.
*knock on wood*

•Belly Button in or out?•
I can see the bottom!

•What I miss•
Being able to bend over. Its not so bad when Chris is right there and can help me out, but when I'm alone and I drop something important, I definitely drop an internal f bomb at the thought of bending over to pick it up.

•What I am looking forward to•
We've got a busy few days coming up. Saturday and Sunday are the childbirth classes, and Monday is the midwife appointment and concert tickets to Wakey!Wakey!
It'll be interesting to see how I feel when I have to go back to work on Tuesday morning.

•Weekly Wisdom•
Belly shots look a million times more impressive with the ocean as your backdrop.

I'm 8 months pregnant with only 8 weeks till the due date!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Oregon Coast

Chris and I rarely have a day off together, so we made the most of this holiday weekend and the random Tuesday that neither of us had to work (Chris actually went in for a few hours in the morning, but I was asleep so it didn't count), and went to the coast.

We headed West on OR-6 towards Tillamook and visited the Tillamook Cheese Factory.

We waited in a ridiculous line for an ice cream cone - Chris got Grandma's Cake Batter in a waffle cone and I got Peaches n' Cream in a sugar cone - and headed out on the self guided tour. We saw the packaging of the cheese and ... well that was about it. We tasted some cheese samples, bought some small blocks of their speciality blends along with some Squeeky Cheese curds (which were fab), and headed out. Overall I give it 3 stars. The whole thing could easily be done in a half hour if you didn't wait in line for ice cream, but really, what's the point in going if you don't get ice cream?

About 6 miles up the road was Oceanside, Oregon and the Three Arch Rocks. We parked the car and walked down to the beach. The temperature was perfect but the winds were a little too strong (should have brought a kite). Chris got some cute maternity pictures of me, and I quickly found out that water logged maternity pants are no fun. I spent the whole time hiking up my jeans as we walked along the water - the elastic waistband was no match for the ocean water. :)

I uploaded a couple photos to the shutterfly account, and will post more tonight, but here's a few to tide you over:

We left home at 1pm and returned about 7pm (and three hours of that was spent enjoying the gorgeous drive). It was a quick trip, but it was a great way to end a 4 day weekend. We can't wait to head back over with a baby and two puppy dogs in tow. Caesar has never been to the Coast before, but I'm sure Apollo will show him how it's done.

Friday, July 2, 2010

31 Weeks!

At 3.5-4 pounds, she's chunking up. She also responds to light and will blink and punch at any flashlight that graces my belly. She's feisty.

•How far along?•
31 weeks

•Total weight gain/loss•
I'm 4-5 pounds above my prepregnancy weight.

•Maternity clothes?•
I ordered some more shirts yesterday to spice up the wardrobe. And, of course, got a coupon in my email today that could have saved me $20. I hate when that happens.

Exhausted. I barely made it past 7pm last night. And so far today I took a 15 minute nap during my morning break and slept during my lunch break. ... I feel like I'm back in the 1st trimester and I HATED the first trimester.

•Best moment this week•
Crib and Glider are all set up in the nursery. It's coming together!

She's running out of room and loves telling me about it. *stretch* I think she's head down lately because all the bulging is up at the top of my stomach. She hasn't taken to playing in my ribs yet and I'm not having much shortness of breath, so that's great.

•Food cravings•
gummy grapefruit slices. I want them, but they immediately annoy my stomach. But they're so good. Guess I'll have to stick to popsicles. ... And possibly those little orange and vanilla ice cream cups parents used to bring into elementary school classrooms for birthdays. Those sound awesome right now.

The paint color is pink. Here's hoping she's still a girl.
It has been confirmed by three ultrasounds, 4 doctors and numerous "Can you check just 1 more time?"

•Labor Signs•
No. But I was not feeling too peachy after going out on non-stop complaints yesterday...

•Belly Button in or out?•
I can see the bottom!

•What I miss•
Sleeping. NAY - Feeling rested. Those are two VERY separate things.

•What I am looking forward to•
Chris and I both have Tuesday off and the weather is supposed to be amazing. Maybe I'll drag him to the Coast... or maybe just to the ice cream counter at the Tillamook factory near the coast.

•Weekly Wisdom•
The 3rd trimester message board on any pregnancy forum will scare the crap out of you. Don't read them. Or at least read them with a GIANT grain of salt.

I survived my first summer & alcohol centered event with marginal success. My forehead is peeling and my new cleavage tan line leaves ALOT to be desired, but I learned that enough mint lemonade can make any hot sunny Saturday outside enjoyable.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010


Sunday - 30w3d - Chris built the glider and put it in the nursery. It's amazingly comfortable, but I'm kindof glad that I feel like it needs a lumbar pillow because it means that the pillow I wanted to make with 'her fabric' will be used. Anyway, that night I started reading the Hypnobirthing book an dliked it WAY more than I thought I would. In fact I didn't put it down until I hit page 125ish at 11pm and realized that I REALLY needed to go to sleep.

While reading, I took the opportunity to shine a light on my tummy and she definitely kicked back at the light just like all the emails said she would. *NEW PARTY TRICK* Also, for the first time I felt her leg (?) just chillin over on the side of my tummy. It's the first time I've felt a body part and not just a mass when poking my belly. exciting.

Monday - 30w4d - Tired as all get out and fairly lazy. That is until Christopher came home and I put him to work building the crib while I made coleslaw wiht our CSA cabbage. Then I proceeded to clean the outside (and TOP) of the refridgerator off and organize the magnets. I think they call this nesting.

Monday night - last night - I couldn't fall asleep. I stayed up late to see who Ali kicked off of the Bachelorette (Poor Craig), then realized I even if I fell asleep right that minute, I'd be tired at work tomorrow so I was already behind the 8 ball.

I went to bed, laid there until 11 COMPLTELY uncomfortable and in my tossing and turning woke up Chris. (It's his day off today, don't feel sorry for him.) He tried to help me fall asleep by rubbing my back until he fell back asleep at 11:20. Then I tried to fall asleep on my own until 11:48. Then I gave up and started watching Dr. G medical examiner. Then it was way past midnight. And when the vile alarm clock went off at 5:08am this morning, Dr. G was still on.
SIDE NOTE: If you think you have a nasty spider bite, you don't. It's MRSA and you need to get on antibiotics. Just so you know.

This Afternoon - 30w5d - There are now 65 days till the due date. The crib and glider are in her room. Clothes are washed and hung. The first batch of cloth diapers are sitting in her room (however I need to wash them the recommended 3 times to increase the absorbancy and I also need to break down and buy a pack of Newborn disposable diapers for her to wear till she chunks up a bit...). Chris has made the comment that all he needs to do is install the carseat and we're ready for her.

I suggested that he sit down in the living room and finish reading the Birth Partner like the doctor instructed him to do. THEN he might be ready.


Anyway, she's been stretching all afternoon. The very top of my tummy - the part I see when I look down between my boobs - keeps getting a hard little foot poking out against it. At least I think its a foot. I suppose she could have her hand outstretched above her head, but she's been going at this for hours and I don't think that'd be a comfy longterm position for her to maintain. SO, I think she's flipped head down. At least for the moment.

I read online that the postion she's in at 35 weeks is most likely the position she'll be in when I go into labor because at that point she just runs out of room to move around that much. So as long as she's head down by July 29th, we'll be golden.


It's kindof nice having a little partner in crime with me all the time. I think it's going to be strange when she's not in there anymore... 5:30! Quittin' time.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

30 Weeks

Photo: I look cute today, I just didn't have time to snap a picture. :) I'll post one later.

At 3.5 pounds, shes beginning to be able to regulate her own temperature so she's losing the lanugo (downy hair) that covered her body earlier. Interesting tidbit: The weight she's gaining now is called white fat, like adults have, versus the brown fat she was gaining in the second trimester that would have protected her from hypothermia had she been delivered very prematurely.

•How far along?•
30 weeks

•Total weight gain/loss•
I'm 2-3 pounds above my prepregnancy weight. Doing good considering all I want is popsicles and ice cream.

•Maternity clothes?•
Still bored with the wardrobe. The weather is still too chaotic to bust out the dresses. And I was so busy painting this weekend that I forgot to do laundry. Awesome :P

I don't think I moved an inch last night once I fell asleep. It's falling asleep that's the issue. That and the leg cramps that I wake up to in the morning - YOWZERS!

•Best moment this week•
I had a midwife appointment on Monday with one of my favorites amongst the midwives (not that I've met many, but that last lady is not welcome back!) and everything was great. I weighed less than I did at my previous appointment (I TOLD you it was a big lunch!), my blood pressure was the lowest its been so far this pregnancy, there was only a trace of protein and my fundal height is measuring right at 29.5 weeks. Plus she told me I looked great. :)

Her movements are definitely less sporadic compared to just 3 weeks ago. I've got lots of little toe tickles down low so I assume she's still breech, and she likes to stretch against the sides of my belly in a way that almost hurts. But it's still neat.

•Food cravings•
Red grapes, gummy grapefruit slices, vanilla ice cream, popsicles, iced tea, etc etc.
Not really craving meat or milk/cheese as much as I was a few weeks ago, but I do love a bowl of Quacker Oatmeal Squarescereal in the morning.


•Labor Signs•

•Belly Button in or out?•
I can see the bottom!

•What I miss•
Being able to suck in my tummy. My stomach muscles are almost sore by the end of the day. She's starting to get heavy.

•What I am looking forward to•
Building the glider and crib!

•Weekly Wisdom•
Ina May's Guide to Childbirth is a highly recommended book, but the first half of it is touchy feely birth stories that I'm not in the mood for. Maybe once I feel like I've read more of the 'assigned literature' I'll go back for a little light reading.

2 Milestones this week:

(1) We painted the nursery. And it is so stinkin' cute I can't even take it.
(2) There is now 10 weeks / 70 days till her due date. As Chris says "I'm starting to freak out a little..."

Thursday, June 17, 2010

29 Weeks!

Photo: I did not take a picture this morning because I woke up at 6:25 thinking it was Saturday and then came to the awful realization that it was Thursday and I was gonna be late for work. Not a beauty today, but I'll take a picture tomorrow morning.


Her eyebrows and eyelashes are completed and now her hair will start growing. Fingers crossed for a blonde. She's getting a little cramped in there and now weighs 3 pounds and is probably about 15.75" long. That doesn't seem like much, but find a 15" ruler and then add some more to it. Scary to think that is pretzeled up in there. :)

•How far along?•
29 weeks

•Total weight gain/loss•
As of yesterday morning (remember I was a little rushed today...) I only weighed .4lbs more than I did when I found out I was pregnant. (Considering she weighs 3 pounds doesn't that technically means that I'm still down 2.5 pounds?) Rockstar. However, I fully expect to start gaining some weight in this third trimester.

•Maternity clothes?•
I'm bored with my wardrobe at this point and really want it to get sunny so I can start wearing some dresses to the office. However, considering I'm pulling double duty next week and have a million inspections to do, I'll still be sporting jeans, steel toed boots and a t shirt for the foreseeable future.

Still sleeping hard, but it's never enough. I had to take a nap at lunch today. I had to make the choice between taco Thursday and a nap. Nap won. That said, I'm starving and need to get buy some food somewhere or I'm gonna get a little punchy.

•Best moment this week•
We picked a pink paint color. Hallelujah. I've got a gallon of Behr's My Fair Lady in Satin finish in my car. Painting of Saturday!! (What a great way to spend our first day off together since Kylie's christening...)

This week her movements have been AWESOME. They aren't sporadic kicks and punches anymore, but instead are these long stretches, and if I happen to have my hand in the right place, I swear I can almost make out the edges of whatever body part is pushing for more room. So neat. I'm still getting a lot of rolling and twitches, and sometimes after dinner, if Chris and I are sitting next to each other, I'll have him watch my stomach as it changes shape. It's really weird not to have any control over her movements/my stomach.

•Food cravings•
We hit up Cold Stone Creamery on Tuesday night after eating at the Olive Garden with Shakes and Sarah. Cream Cheese ice cream with cherry pie filling. Holy! It was so good.


•Labor Signs•

•Belly Button in or out?•
I think it's shallower than I think.

•What I miss•
I miss feeling refreshed after a night's sleep.

•What I am looking forward to•
Spending the WHOLE DAY with Chris on Saturday! And I guess my Midwife appointment on Monday...

•Weekly Wisdom•
I have 4 very sizable books to read and only 8 weeks till I'm full term. Add on a full time job, 8 hours of commuting and a house that the dogs destroy on a daily basis and I have no idea how I'm going to get all this reading done.

Also, I'm still highly annoyed about the childbirth classes being cancelled.

Saturday will mark 75 days till my due date. Eeek!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Childbirth Classes

So apparently there was a family emergency and the entire childbirth class - all 7 sessions - have been cancelled. Due to our opposite work schedules, the only class we can take without too much of a disruption would be a 2 day weekend intensive class on July 10th and 11th. Then we'll take the breastfeeding basics and Newborn care classes later in July. For our inconvenience they're throwing in a free infant CPR certification, but I'm still a little dissapointed. I really didn't want it all crammed into two 8 hour days. :-/ I guess if any questions come up afterwards, we can just ask them at our midwife appointment. Meh.

Growth Scan - 28.5 weeks

At my 27 week midwife appointment my fundal height was measuring at 30 weeks. Since I hadn't yet had my GD screening, they were concerned that she might be getting a little too big, so they scheduled a growth scan to check her measurements.

Our appointment was Monday at 2:30p so Chris met me at the hospital after work. I could tell from the moment my name was called that this was not going to be a good ultrasound. The tech had such a thick french accent that I could barely understand my own name when she said it. When we got back to the room it was pretty evident that she was not at all comfortable operating the machine and spent the majority of the session staring at the keyboard trying to find a certain key.

Then little girl was being stubborn as per usual. She was breech (not that I'm concerned about that - she has plenty of time to flip) with her spin facing up (so she was looking at my back) with her head tucked down to her chest FAST asleep. Her head wasn't even slightly tilted to one side or the other so we could get a glimpse. Little stinker.

It makes sense, but as the pregnancy progresses, her bones start to calcify and aren't as transparent. That coupled with her horrible position meant that her ribs were casting shadows on every part of the anatomy they wanted to check so I was poked and prodded far harder than I have been before.

Then to top it all off, the tech was so boring and quiet that Chris almost fell asleep during the scan. It was not nearly as exciting as the previous scans.

But she looked great and was measuring at about 28weeks 6days on most body parts with slightly longer femurs (she's gonna be tall!).

So then the tech leaves and we're waiting in the room for probably 20 minutes for the doctor to come in.

He introduces himself and immediately asks to describe the issues I've been having with this pregnancy.

Umm... what?

*Insert minor freak out*

He clarified that he'd been looking through my chart and couldn't figure out why I was coming in for a scan when everything in my chart looked so normal. Note to doctor - you should LEAD with the 'Normal' diagnosis before scaring the crap out of me. I explained about the fundal height and the concern my midwife had had with GD (even though I ROCKED my screening with a score of 86 when 130 was the cutoff).

We discussed that since we were tall that he wasn't surprised that her limbs were long, but that she was measuring right at the 55th percentile for everything and looked great. She weighs 2lbs 15oz by their measurements and my amniotic fluid level was 18cm and normal. Therefore I blame the crazy fundal measurement on the amazing (and filling) lunch my coworker and I ate right before my 27 week appointment.

In fact, I just compared my 27 and 28 week belly shot, and I'm slightly smaller in the 28 week photo. I'm also weighing about 2 pounds less than I did that week, so chalk the whole thing up to a fat week and lets move on. :)

So in conclusion - she's measuring fine, she's still stubborn and we didn't get any pictures. Diva.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

28 Weeks!

I am officially in the third trimester now. Intense. People keep saying it's the home stretch, but it also feels like a million lightyears ago that I entered the 2nd trimester, so maybe it won't go by as fast as I'm fearing.

•How far along?•
28 weeks

•Total weight gain/loss•
I think I've officially gained weight with this pregnancy now - I'm up about a pound from where I was back at Christmas. Not bad!

•Maternity clothes?•
Chris and I discussed the finer points of nursing bras last night. It was kindof a weird conversation. :)

I need more. But I must be sleeping like a rock during the night because the last few nights I haven't even rolled over. I've slept on my left side the whole night and, besides maybe adjusting my legs, I think I'm pretty much dead to the world.

•Best moment this week•
The best birthday gift I got, even better than the balloons my parents had delivered to my office, was the nes that I passed the gestational diabetes screening and that I'm looking fine as far as PreE goes. WOOT!

I'm expecting it to start slowing down now. They say that the movement reaches a peak from 24-28 weeks, and then just becomes more jabs and kicks and less rolling and gymnastic movements. She's pretty good at letting me know she's in there, and I think she's currently head down with the hiccups - weirdest sensation ever.

•Food cravings•
Groupons sucked me in this morning with a coupon to a local Rice Pudding cafe. I've never been there, but if it was in Beaverton and not SW Portland, I'd know where we were getting dessert. However, I do have a birthday coupon for cold stone creamery that I'm sure Chris would be more than happy to redeem.


•Labor Signs•

•Belly Button in or out?•
It's shallow for me, but still has a way to go before it's flat.

•What I miss•
Being able to hug Chris without my stomach/boobs getting in the way. He commented on that last night when I got home from work.

•What I am looking forward to•
MONDAY! I have a growth ultrasound on Monday. I'll be 28.5 weeks and I haven't seen her since 22.5 weeks. We've been pretty lucky though. I got an ultrasound at 6.5 weeks to confirm, then we had the NT scan at 13.5 weeks, the BIG ultrasound at 19.5 weeks and the BIG 2.0 at 22.5 weeks, so this will be our 5th peak at Miss thang, and my midwife was talking about another growth check up in 4-6 weeks. Sweet.

•Weekly Wisdom•
Expensive restaurants while pregnant are not worth it. The portion aren't big enough for this hungry hippo and the funky cheese they sprinkle on everything will turn your stomach from the second they set the plate down. I made a bad selection for my birthday dinner and next time will have more respect for Olive Garden and their unlimited breadsticks. :)

Third Trimester!

Stay tuned to hear how the ultrasound goes on Monday and how Chris fares at the first childbirth class Tuesday evening.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Happy Birthday To ME!

So on Saturday I met this lady and bought her nightstand to use as a sidetable next to the glider in the nursery. I had been looking all over for a decently priced table, and when I finally found this one on craigslist for only $35 I flipped. It's exactly what I wanted.

photo from the craigslist ad.

Then I met up with Chris (who got off work 'early'), Justin, Sarah and Regan and Becky who were visiting from Massachusetts. Becky is a sweetheart and it was fun to make fun of Regan again. "Wait, a lamb is a baby sheep?" yes. he said that.

Here's a picture of the studs down by the waterfront.
Regan, Chris, Shakes

I wish Chris and I were able to spend more time with them at the Rose festival, but Chris had to work at 4am the next morning and I can't go on any of the rides because Hannah is too 'sensitive' *wink*

Here is a Beautiful rose that is currently growing at my house. Seriously. It's perfect.

Sunday was a quiet day at home. I got lots of stuff done around the house. At least I think I did. I don't really remember. Monday I spent all freakin' morning at the hospital lab doing my gestational diabetes glucose test. Ugh. Then I got home and made an awesome pasta salad and some lemon raspbery mousse squares (Thanks Kraftfood recipe ad in the waiting room magazine).

Then we met Justin and Sarah downtown for dinner at Paley's Place. Awful. I hated it. Loved the company, hated the restaurant. Luckily they all indulged me and went out for gelato afterwards even after spending WAY too much for WAY too tiny of a dinner. I'm usually a fruity gelato girl, but this time I went with (1) Sweet Italian Cream (2) Chocolate Hazelnut and (3) Hazelnut. Fabulous. OMG. The Hazelnut was awesome.

Oh, this is what I see when I look down now:

We were a little bored waiting for Shakes and Sarah before dinner so I started snapping pictures. :)

So today is my birthday. This is the first time I've actually WORKED on my birthday and I'm not a huge fan. I think it should be a personal holiday. I could have taken it off, but I'm in the mindset that every day I take off NOW is one less day of paid maternity leave I'll have THEN.

My parents had these delivered to my office, which was super sweet and unexpected.

And Chris said he's making my favorite dinner tonight - Chicken parm with a side dish of sliced yellow and green summer squash. Yumm-o.


My midwife called the house line and told Chris that I needed to call her back so she could talk to me about my test results for gestational diabetes and preeclampsia. Scary. And when a doctor calls and says that you need to call them back in order to get test results... uh... I'm not expecting good news.

However, she said that everything looked normal! Seriously, best birthday gift I could have asked for.

That's about it!

Friday, June 4, 2010

The Good and Bad of my Midwife Appointment

My coworker and I went out to lunch yesterday and had a fabulous meal.

Stepping on the scale after said lunch.
4:10pm appt should be reserved for skinny chicks and I should get dibs on the first appt of the day.
I'm just sayin'...

She approved of the childbirth books I'd ordered and appreciated when I asked for any of her suggestions.

My reading list is now 5 times longer than it was.

She gave us the Doula lecture and just might have won over Chris on the benefits of a doula.

The hospital have volunteer doulas there occasionally, but if you'd rather guarantee a doula is available for the birth, you need to buy in on one of their 'package' deals that cost about $700. Added to my list of things to do is now finding a doula that is in the middle of certification and need some more experience - aka - free.

My blood pressure was normal.

I still got the preeclampsia lecture including the line "We just want you to be aware that we could have to induce you as early as 30 weeks if it becomes an issue." (In my head I'm doing quick math, realizing this is only 3 weeks away and then realizing that I don't even have a diaper bag.)
*Insert silent mental freak out.*

She follows that line with "But it's only an issue if you start spilling protein..."

I give the required urine sample and, of course, I'm spilling protein.

•Even Worse•
Now I have to do a 24 collection on Sunday. Don't even ask what that entails.

My birthday is on Tuesday.

I have to do my gestational diabetes 1 hour test on Monday.
Which means if I fail, my first punishment is no birthday cake.

I haven't cried yet during this appointment.
But trust me, the tears are right there...

My fundal height is measuring at 30 weeks when I'm only 27 weeks. So while preeclampsia could mean growth restriction, GD could mean gigantic baby.
Midwife wants to check in on the baby's growth.

She wants an ultrasound before my next appointment in 2 weeks. And another 3-4 weeks after that.

It was after 5pm when we got out of our appointment so we couldn't schedule them that day and I just realized that it's 5:15pm on a FRIDAY and I forgot to call them to schedule.
Must. Remember. To. Call. First. Thing. MONDAY.

After getting the Doula and Preeclampsia lecture, the midwife decided to go easy on me and skip the weight lecture. I'm going to assume it wasn't because my 20 minute appointment was quickly approaching the hour mark and say that she thought it wasn't necessary because I've actually done really well on the weight gain aspect. Which, I have.

Worst Doctor's Appointment EVER.



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